Saturday, 9 June 2012

If you go down to the woods today...

A sneak preview of Lynda Snell's Woodland Observation video revealed Nic and Will up to no good / very good / good as it gets* in the woods on Friday. As this was before the watershed a judiciously edited version was broadcast. It is important we know the full extent of the content.

Had the film of Nic and Will.I.bore continued we would have seen Jennifer appear with a Venison Casserole. She has previous, let's not forget.

Later still there is footage of Ian appearing from behind a tree with a tray full of mini-bakewell tarts for an assignation with Mr Pullen, in a rather fetching pinny - Ian has his needs, and Adam has been below par since his accident. This was filmed just before Mr Pullen arrived, exhausted, to cut the Jubilee Cake.

Tilly Button can be seen in the distance, dancing around what appears to be a makeshift altar. There seems to be a large bird on the altar - can't be sure but it seems to have long and very impressive feathers. It seems to give one, final, haunting squawk. I'm sure someone in the background is calling: "Eccles! Eccles!"

There's the swish of a tasselled loafer and Brian comes into vision, brazenly flourishing his hosepipe. Has the man no shame, or does he know something about the ban being lifted?

Lynda herself appears, with both llamas in tow, but to everyone's relief the screen flickers to black.

In other news, the campaign to have Weights and Measures recognise The Squirrel as an international unit of measurement received a major boost with the BBC Wireless Programme Saturday Live expressing full support for the proposal. This is a major development which we will follow with interest. It can only be hoped that Saturday Live may ultimately provide the haven for those suffering from Archers Saturday Syndrome (ASS).

* Delete as inappropriate

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